Politicians at play

Turning on the television last week, my first thought was: “Oh, it’s Play School.” Another look showed: No, it wasn’t Play School. It was an extract from Federal Parliamentary proceedings.

It seems one leader had a fistful of photographs, blown up large for display. Another pollie - could it have been on another day? - waved a big red placard which seemed to have a cheque format. It would be reasonable to conclude that it was big fat cheque with a whopper of a figure on it. How so?

Perhaps it was a maths lesson?

One side said if you borrow this amount, this and this would happen. The other side said if it were governing it would borrow too, but less, and would do it better.

No, it was not a maths lesson. It was an exercise in upmanship (or upwomanship?) in true schoolyard style. They were apparently discussing the nation’s finances, but it was not at all clear. Each side was so busy throwing invective at the other and doing their best to belittle an opponent. So where did that get us? How did that help the economy? Or even the price of fish?

“I’ve got the best photos!” One waved photographs for all to see.

“No, you haven’t,” answered the other. “I’ve got the best blow ups.”

“Yaddie yaddie yah, so there,” and so they went on. Or something like that.

But who or what were they fighting about? Could it be the global financial crisis? No, not really, even if it provided the immediate excuse. Could it be imminent climate change challenges? Nah. Maybe, the swine flu epidemic we all expect to get? Nah. They were on about what they relish most. Scoring party political points: it is a most satisfying occupation. Let’s face it, biffing the other fellow in public is much more invigorating than boring old government and governing, and all that stuff. And it was probably going to be on TV!

Always so eager for the next party political joust, neither political side (perhaps all sides) seem to recognise just how jacked off with their antics are Mr and Ms Australia. “A plague on both your houses” does not come near to reflecting the anger, frustration and scepticism you hear at the shopping centre, in the pub, or from the inevitable taxi driver. As Mr and Ms Australia deeply worry about finances and impending climate change (putting the flu on hold as a seasonal event), they see such party political antics as self-indulgent kiddie games. To them it has little or nothing to do with government, or caring for the nation (i.e., their children’s future). They see it for the partisan self-serving nonsense it is.

Whatever made politicians think that Mr and Ms Australia were so dumb?

From time to time we hear throw-away comments about a nanny state. Well, perhaps the nanny state bit is not such a bad idea. We’ll put her in charge of the pollies so they learn to think about other things - and not just about their factions, their own careers and how next time, they can give it to “the others”. That’ll sort ’em! She or he (we must not be discriminatory) could bring some order to the play yard. Forgive me, I forgot. It’s the Federal Parliament, not a kindergarten. I quite mistook it. So who is governing as they play? The bureaucracy? Dear, oh dear, what about democracy?

Hang on, how much are these guys paid?

In a recent report The Australian focused on politicians and those who lost income as a result of the 2008 election. It said one federal minister in the prior government had taken a $90,000 pay cut on the $200,000-plus salary he had previously earned. The base pay of a federal MP was put at $127,600 a year, with electorate allowances and perks, such as a car. Cabinet ministers earned about $219,000 a year. Interesting, isn’t it. I’d hate to add it all up.

It is only fair to acknowledge that some politicians work incredible hours and have the country’s interests truly at heart. Probably, even those that make such spectacles of themselves in parliamentary “debate” (aka rampant partisan gamesmanship) work hard too - at other times. Hopefully, when they are not showing off before TV cameras with their silly spats and props, they really do toil on our behalf. But the public does not see that. They see only the ludicrous, fatuous and sometimes insidious posturing on camera during parliamentary debate, or excuse for debate thereof. A plague on all your photographs and placards - Mr and Ms Australia don’t want a bar of it.

Given the real challenges, financial and global warming in our contemporary world, voters want to be reassured that all political representatives - government, opposition and others - are getting on with the business of government, doing their best to look after everyone’s interests, health and future. Does that sound too simple? That’s what they were elected to do and that is what voters pay for.

Or would they rather that - the next time any of us visit the Parliamentary visitors’ gallery - we turn up with streamers and balloons?