Help raise the alarm about elder abuse

Sunday, June 15 marked the United Nations Assembly on Ageing World Elder Abuse Awareness Day. It is a day that went by failing to attract mass media attention, despite the very real presence of elder abuse within our families, communities and institutions. It is an issue that evokes a great sense of discomfort, shame and fear and is seldom acknowledged or spoken about.

For the past few years I have been working as an advocate for older Victorians. My work has provided me with a great deal of insight into the issue of elder abuse and I have been involved with government and community lead strategies to prevent and resolve this appalling social issue.

Despite the best efforts of my colleagues at all levels of government and human service sectors, it is an indisputable fact that many within our ageing population continue to feel anxious, frightened and hurt by us in their retirement years.

How often do we hear horror stories of abuse and neglect of older people in nursing homes - places where older people are reassured they will be well cared for and feel safe and secure.

How often do we witness incidents of elder abuse without giving it a second thought: the elderly mother in the supermarket being told off by her daughter for putting butter in the trolley when she has a cholesterol problem; the elderly woman’s dismay at having to replace the butter, and confusion at why she is not allowed to eat butter when for so long she had been unable to afford it.

How often do we see older people we love and care for being hurt, neglected or ignored. Yet, so few of us think to do anything about it, or when we do take action, our complaints fall upon deaf ears.

I know of one elderly man, Tony*, recently widowed, who has endured over ten years of abuse at the hands of his own children. He admits to being hit, pushed, screamed at, stolen from and taken advantage of.

His son brazenly used Tony’s home as the headquarters for his illegal drug dealing activities, even after serving three years in prison, while Tony’s daughter, entrusted with the management of Tony’s superannuation, blew the lot on sports cars and a fast lifestyle. Her shameless actions have left her father penniless after slaving 40 years in the steel works in order to give his family a better life, having migrated from Eastern Europe in the 1960s.

Their behaviour has been not only broken laws; it has broken his heart. Now he is not just fearful for his financial security; he is fearful of harm at their hands.

Sadly, unless he chooses to report the abuse to authorities, there is little anyone can do. I have beseeched him to seek help, and if necessary press charges, but isolated due to his increasing fragility and diminishing social networks, he remains a loyal father, anxious to protect his children from the law and to hold on to the familiar contact they provide for him.

In our multicultural society, our understanding and identification with ageing and older people differs greatly. Our various cultures and religions shape the way that we treat and value each other.

As a child of migrants myself, I understand and share the difficulty and frustration experienced by other first and second generation Australians in negotiating intergenerational conflicts over values and lifestyles. Still, I have yet to come across a culture that does not encourage its young to grow up to respect their elders.

So why does elder abuse continue to happen and why is this situation so dire that the United Nations feels compelled to nominate a day decrying it?

There is no doubt that our lifestyles are becoming increasingly complex as many of us push ourselves far beyond our limits in order to “get ahead.” In our busy lives, many of us tend to view older people as an unfashionable afterthought or even a confronting reminder of our own mortality and impending vulnerability. As our parents age, for instance, the exchanging of roles from carer to the ones needing care is often frightening, difficult and sometimes very wearing on the younger generation.

This is not an excuse to abuse our elderly.

We need to begin talking more honestly about ageing and what this means to us if we are seriously address the epidemic of elder abuse that is devastating the lives of some of the most vulnerable in our society.

A solid commitment and investment needs to be made by governments and communities to bring this issue into the public domain and promote the rights of older people.

Legislation introduced by the Commonwealth last year means our nursing homes and aged care hostels must now report any suspected or proven cases of physical and sexual abuse of their residents, giving some protection to older people who live in residential care facilities. However, this legislation does not take into account the many other forms of abuse that occur within these settings, nor the increasing trend of older people opting to live independently in their own homes or with their families. As Tony’s case illustrates, it is within home environments that many of the worst cases of elder abuse occur.

Acknowledging this trend, the Victorian Government has invested in an elder abuse prevention strategy to be lead by a new service launched today called Senior Rights Victoria. Senior Rights Victoria has been operating for approximately six weeks, having fielded about 200 telephone enquiries to date. It provides information, education and legal advice for older Victorians and the wider community about elder abuse.

Despite this, more needs to be done to educate and support older people about elder abuse, as many older Victorians fail to access such services for a myriad of reasons including geographic or social isolation and language and cultural barriers.

June 15 was about taking the time to think about how we relate to older people and how we expect to be treated as we grow older. This is something that must continue and questions that we must ask ourselves every day if we want to start the process of ensuring that people like Tony aren’t forced to suffer in silence, but find the courage and support to live out their lives with the dignity and respect they so richly deserve.

* Names have been changed in this article.