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Jesus guilty! A slice of Roman talkback

By Peter Fleming - posted Thursday, 5 April 2007

Eight minutes past three, on this very good Friday. Call us on the open line and tell us what you think.

Well, we got him. It's been a long time coming, but, finally: he's confessed. Egg on the face of all his supporters this afternoon, as self-confessed terrorist Jesus Christ gets exactly what he deserved. And some would say crucifixion is too good for the likes of him.

It's my understanding he was arrested at approximately 8.30 last evening, hiding out in a mountain of olives, after government authorities - working with the religious leadership - employed one Judas Iscariot, who had infiltrated his network of supporters, to lead them to him.


Then, in a rapid series of late night sittings and early morning hearings, the Sanhedrin, the Roman governor Pontius Pilate AND King Herod himself ALL came to the same conclusion: this grubby threat to the civilised world had to be dealt with, and promptly.

Swift justice, eh? Why can't the judges always be that quick, that's what I'd like to know. Caller, hello.

Caller: Hello?

Go ahead Longinus. You're on.

Caller: Oh, hi, Psittacus, love listening to your show.

That's okay, Longinus. We love hearing what the people think.


Caller: Mate, what did they get this coot on in the end? I mean, he's got - he's got -

He's got a list of offences up to your armpit, hasn't he?

Caller: That's what I mean, mate. What did they do him for?

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First published in Eureka Street on April 3, 2007.

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About the Author

Peter Fleming graduated in Arts and Education from the University of Sydney; his studies focusing on Classical History, English Literature and American Music Theatre. He is a graduate of the NIDA Playwrights Studio. He has taught in schools, universities and tertiary colleges, covering subjects such as Ancient History, Religion, English Literature, Theatre History and Arts Administration. He also survived a year of teaching drama in North Carolina.

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Creative Commons LicenseThis work is licensed under a Creative Commons License.

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