I was wrong, Iraqis want the war so they can be rid of Saddam

"We didn't want to be here tonight," he continued. "When the Priest asked us to gather for a Peace Service we said we didn't want to come"

"What do you mean?" I inquired, confused.

"We didn't want to come because we don't want peace," he replied. "We want the war to come."

A strange oddessy begins

Beginning that night and continuing on in the private homes of relatives with whom I stayed, little by little the scales began to come off my eyes.

All foreigners in Iraq are subject to 24-hour surveillance by government minders, who arrange all interviews, visits and contact with ordinary Iraqis. But by some fluke, either of my invitation as a religious person or my family connection, I was not subject to any government minders at any time throughout my stay in Iraq.

As far as I can tell I was the only person including the media, Human Shields and others in Iraq without a government minder.

What emerged was something so awful that it is difficult even now to write about it. Discussing with the head of our tribe what I should do, as I wanted to stay in Baghdad with our people during their time of trial, I was told that I could most help the Assyrian cause by going out and telling the story to the outside world.

Simply put, those living in Iraq are in a living nightmare. From the terror that would come across the faces of my family at the arrival of an unknown visitor, a telephone call, a knock at the door, I began to realise the horror they lived with every day.

Over and over I asked them: "Why could you want war? Why could any human being desire war?"

Their answer was quiet and measured: "Look at our lives! We are living like animals. No food, no car, no telephone, no job and most of all no hope."

I would marvel as my family went about their daily routine as normal as could be. Baghdad was completely serene without even a hint of war. Father would get up, have his breakfast and go off to work. The children to school, the old people - ten in the household - to their daily chores.

"You can not imagine what it is to live with war for 20, 30 years. We have to keep up our routine or we would lose our minds."
Then I began to see around me those who had lost their minds. It seemed in every household there was one or more who in any other society would be in a Mental Hospital and the ever-present picture of a family member killed in one of the many wars.