The bullshit detector's survival guide

Step 4. Mock mercilessly

Ridicule is a potent solvent. Monty Python knew this instinctively. Their sketch about the Ministry of Silly Walks said more about bureaucratic silliness than a hundred Royal Commissions.

The Yes Minister television series was practically a documentary, lampooning administrative inertia and euphemistic doublespeak. Sir Humphrey's ability to prattle on at great length should be studied in schools as a warning.

Satire rarely changes laws, but it can change language-and that's where bullshit lives. A sharp line, a well-placed joke, or a perfectly timed parody can make a phrase unusable in public ever again. Whenever you get the chance, poke fun at corporate clichés ("We value your call; We are passionate about …?"). Laugh at politicians who employ the passive voice to avoid accountability ( "Mistakes were made") and skewer management jargon ("Going forward; Leaning in").

Laughter disarms. It punctures pomposity. It unites the listeners against the windbags-and sometimes, it rewrites the script entirely.

Bullshit survives because we're too polite to name it. Instead, we say "that's problematic" or "that seems somewhat unclear." But sometimes, the most honest thing to say is simply: "That's bullshit." It's not rude. It's precise. And it's a public service.

Step 5. Cui bono (who benefits)?

Remember: bullshit is rarely free. It usually has a sponsor. When someone insists that "independent research shows…" or that "consumers overwhelmingly prefer…", ask who paid for the study.

If an oil company funds research on clean coal, a pharmaceutical company pays for research, or a bank subsidises surveys about consumer trust, you don't need Sherlock Holmes to guess the outcome. Following the incentives is the quickest way to see through the fog.

Step 6. Check the track record

Bullshit is often loudest when it's newest. A bold claim, a miracle cure, a revolutionary policy-they all arrive with fanfare. The question is not "what are they saying now?" but "how did their last big idea turn out?"

Did the innovation "transform education," or did it quietly disappear in a footnote? Did the wonder drug cure cancer-or just enrich its shareholders? Did last year's "visionary reform" improve lives-or create another committee?

Patterns matter. If someone leaves a trail of broken promises and failed predictions, don't waste time parsing their latest jargon. Their record speaks louder than their rhetoric.

Step 7. Study the bullshit curriculum

If you want to sharpen your bullshit detection skills even further, consider visiting CallingBullshit.org. Created by professors Carl Bergstrom and Jevin West at the University of Washington, the site is a brilliant companion to this guide. It features case studies, video lectures, and a full university course titled "Calling Bullshit: Data Reasoning in a Digital World."

The course dissects data misuse, dodgy graphs, and statistical trickery with surgical precision. If this little guide of mine is your pocketknife, Calling Bullshit is a full toolkit. It won't make you cynical, but it will make you sharper.

In conclusion

We can't eliminate bullshit-but we can become immune to its charm. That means spotting it early, asking sharp questions, and refusing to nod along. Bullshit thrives in vagueness. It wilts under clarity, scrutiny, and wit. You don't need a PhD to dismantle it-just a cool head and a sharp ear.

In a world of waffle and weasel words, plain speaking is a small act of rebellion. Saying "That's bullshit-and here's why" isn't just satisfying. It's an absolute necessity.