Indonesia and Australia: mates no more?

In talk shows he listens intently and appears to respect questioners. His answers tend to be thoughtful, though faltering; they're not glib or dismissive. An electorate desperate for change is projecting too many qualities on the man. They laugh too easily at his limp jokes, clap too wildly at his statements.

If Jokowi really does want the top job he's so far not displayed the raw, snarling hunger shown by his opponent desperate to capture the palace.

Jokowi is also handicapped by the presence of former president Megawati who often accompanies him on the campaign trail (along with her ambitious daughter Puan Maharani), like a mother ensuring son's jocks are clean. She's also there to remind the electorate that she's the kingmaker, rightful daughter of the nation's founder Soekarno who has selected Jokowi to do her bidding. Surveys indicate this rankles with the electorate.

There's no Mummy figure in Prabowo's battalions blitzing their way through the electorate suggesting a return to the golden era of cheap rice (because it was subsidized) and less crime (because suspected criminals were shot on the street, their fly-blown corpses a warning to the lawless), and to make the nation great.

What else matters to the average voter? Human rights abuses – who cares? International relations – nothing to do with us. Foreign investors – kick them all out, we'll do everything ourselves. Religious intolerance? If they don't like it let them leave. Only a public outcry has forced Prabowo to modify a policy clause that 'the State must regulate religious freedom'.

Overblown rhetoric and wild statements soon collide with reality once candidates turn winners. That's true worldwide. Pledges are shredded and the language twisted and warped to explain why words aren't being honoured. John Howard's 'not a core promise' is a classic in the genre.

Watching the passionate debates night after night on Indonesian TV arouses admiration: For all the screamingly obvious faults this is a nation with the most free and robust media in Southeast Asia.

Indonesians are embracing democracy, and whatever we think, they're doing it their way. We're the ones who'll have to adjust to the new people moving in next door.