Celebrating fatherhood for all the right reasons

1. Take a stand against the moral anarchy that so easily pervades our lives. We must regain our moral fibre. If we don't stand for something we will fall for anything. As men we must heed the words of Albert Einstein, "Gentlemen, try not to become men of success. Rather. Become men of value."

2. Discern between healthy shame that tells us when we are doing wrong and unhealthy shame that will drive us to despondency and despair. We must accept the good and reject the bad. We need help from our Father in heaven on this one because true forgiveness comes from heaven and we all need forgiveness even if we don't like to admit it.

3. Be aware of the innate bias in academic, government and media circles and call out the lies for what they are. If we don't, our children will be crushed by the oppression we refuse to expose.

4. Be aware as men of our proclivity for passivity. As Robert Lewis said, "Reject passivity, accept responsibility, lead courageously and expect God's reward".

5. Be aware that at times our heroic stoicism can destroy us. We have to be firm and strong as men and fathers and only make the sacrifices that are proper and true as opposed to those that are improper and false.

Our children will become not what we say but who we are. Mahatma Gondi said, "You must become the change you seek. Rudyard Kipling, in his famous poem 'If', says it well.

IF you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
' Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

As Rudyard Kipling points out in manhood everything is in tension. To celebrate fatherhood we must embrace the tension of the task at hand and the responsibility that goes with it. We as men must be strong yet gentle, loving yet firm, confident but humble, courageous yet caring. The title of Stu Webber's book, The Tender Warrior, says it all. Make sure you celebrate Fatherhood and Father's Day when it come around again, but for all the right reasons.