Men in the age of feminism

The really hard part here is:  so how do we raise boys? These days we are hearing that boys are more fragile than we thought. Evidence is confronting us that males - especially working class males - are represented in school suspension and expulsion lists far  more than they should be. Evidence from the biologists and child psychologists provides more challenges. The male embryo is more vulnerable than the female from a host of defects including premature birth and stillbirth. And from there on, it's all downhill.

After birth, a host of developmental disorders beset boys more than girls. These include hyperactivity, reading delay, conduct and oppositional disorders. These matters, too, are controversial.

In an earlier article I wrote about the problem of assessing hyperactivity and apparent over-prescription of drugs to cure it. The researcher Matthew Smith argues that Mozart, Einstein and others would be described as hyperactive if they were alive today. Over-active teenagers aren't a problem on the football field or the basketball court. They are just a problem for teachers scared of boisterous activity in kids, teachers who want everybody to sit still and listen all day.

Young males deny their feelings and are poor judges of risk of all kinds. Younger males are at great risk of self harm, including suicide. These patterns persist in later life. Males suicide more than females at every stage of the adult lifetime. Men won't tell doctors of their complaints for fear of being labeled whingers. Males are trying to do something extra to keep up with females all through their lifetime. And women survive men by a number of years in all countries surveyed.

What does all this mean to each of us?

Too often, the media talk about gender wars. They sometimes see feminists as people who dislike men; maybe some of them do. But many a feminist gains a new perspective on life when she gives birth to a beautiful baby boy. Most women and men want to like the other sex, and probably do in one way or another. I tell parents "Remember that your son will want to marry someone…probably, a woman". As an educator, I want all girls and boys to get the encouragement they need. And I'm a very proud granddad. My grandsons and granddaughter are the smartest, most wonderful creatures in the whole wide world. Let's hope they grow up in a world that values men and women alike.